Lamb by Christopher Moore

My friend read this book on our beach vacation. I’m always down for satire, and it’s been a while since my last religion book.

1) “‘So you say. But I think that when I’m a man, and your father dies, I will take your mother as my wife.'” – Biff

2) “‘Do you ever see me cry? I have nothing, so I am slave to nothing. I have nothing to do, so nothing makes me its slave.’” – Bartholomew

3) “‘You see, my plan is working. For it is written that “if the wise man always appears stupid, his failures do not disappoint, and his success gives pleasant surprise.”‘” – Biff

4) “‘Exactly. You can think you’re a palm tree if you want, just don’t tell anyone. You can think you’re a flock of seagulls, just don’t tell anyone.'” – Hillel

5) “You know if you had more gods you wouldn’t have to be so worried about making one angry?'” – Titus

6) “It’s wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.”

7) “It’s hard for me, a Jew, to stay in the moment. Without the past, where is the guilt? And without the future, where is the dread? And without guilt and dread, who am I?”

8) “‘Why would the Lord create a creature only to have it die out? Why would the Lord allow that?'” – Joshua

9) “‘I do. I do. What’s an apostle?'” – Nathaniel

10) “Faith isn’t an act of intelligence, it’s an act of imagination.”

This was a whimsical book that taught me some things about Christianity, although it was hard to tell what was “real” and what was “fiction.” It started strong but somewhat dragged on as Biff and Joshua went around and learned about other religions. But the worst part was probably the gathering of the apostles. It felt rushed and haphazard. Maybe I needed more context to get it. I also enjoyed the scenes with Pontius Pilate that reminded me of another satirical version of events in The Master and the Margarita.